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2012 IN REVIEW: My Top 10 Worst Films of 2012, featuring a review of the #1 Worst Film of 2012

February 7, 2013 5 comments

As you may already know, I’m of the opinion that 2012 was a pretty strong year for films. But even in the best of years there is always a deluge of awful just waiting around the corner to ruin your good time.

Unless you want to actually watch a bad movie (and, let’s face it, sometimes it’s fun to watch bad movies), I strongly advise against watching any of the films below. And even if you are in the mood for a bad movie, I would still recommend never, ever seeing the film that quite literally stole the top spot on my list.

The Cabin in the Woods - Just your typical college kids doing typical college things in a cabin in the woods

It was honestly so bad, I broke a few rules just to avoid having to write about it again and made my say here my final say on the movie overall. Previous lists never featured a built-in film review for any of the films that didn’t have one previously on The Viewer’s Commentary, but this film was a special kind of awful, and so I decided to treat it thus just for this occasion.

Which film could possibly be so bad to inspire such madness? Well you’ll have to read on to find out. … Or you could just scroll down and spoil the surprise, but… well, that would be kind a mean and hurt my feelings. I already compiled this list for you so that you could avoid them and have a good time, and all, and you’re just going to ignore all my hard work, aren’t you?… :( Read more…

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2012 IN REVIEW – The Films I Didn’t See: September – December

January 28, 2013 1 comment

1134604 - Zero Dark Thirty

My apologies for the slightly longer delay in getting this part out. I kinda got stricken with the flu for a few days, and didn’t exactly feel like writing. But, here it is, the final third of the films I didn’t see in the year 2012. This is the period of time where the summer movies begin to trickle out before coming to a complete stop and where film studios begin their flood of Oscar-baiting dramas and such.

That’s not to say that there are never any good action films released during this time. That also isn’t to say that none of these Oscar-baiting films are any good, too. Far from it. 2012 saw the release of Oscar-worthy greats as Argo, Lincoln, and Zero Dark Thirty releasing in the same time period as cash-grabbing features like the final Twilight film, The Hobbit, and Wreck-it Ralph, all with varying degrees of success. It’s actually a fairly ripe time to watch all sorts of movies, come to think of it. Possibly better than even summer!

Django Unchained - Christoph Waltz and Jamie Foxx

Still, it’s not like I’m going to see every film released during this time. If anything, I ran out of time and risked going out of budget for all the films that I did want to see, but didn’t always have time to. Then there were also films that, quite frankly, I could just do without seeing. But, for the purposes of this article, I’ve gone through and examined all these, both enticing and repugnant, some being granted my attention possibly for the last time ever, and have collected my thoughts and impressions below. As mentioned previously in parts 1 and 2, this isn’t my final say on these films, and some of the commentary below is based pretty much on plot synopses, other reviews, skimmings, and a heavy use of Wikipedia and Rotten Tomatoes. I watched the trailers where I could and didn’t for those films that I just basically didn’t care. Which ones are those? Read, and you may just find out! Read more…

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Independence Day Review: … “Independence Day” of course!

July 3, 2012 2 comments
Directed by: Roland Emmerich
Produced by: Dean Devlin
Written by: Dean Devlin, Roland Emmerich
Cinematography by: Karl Walter Lindenlaub
Music by: David Arnold
Starring: Will Smith, Jeff Goldblum, Bill Pullman, Margaret Colin, Vivica A. Fox, Mary McDonnell, Judd Hirsch, Robert Loggia, Randy Quaid, James Rebhorn, James Duval, Adam Baldwin, Harry Connick, Jr., Mae Whitman, Harvey Fierstein, Brent Spiner, Frank Welker (voice)
Year: 1996

 

There’s an exchange between two characters in this film that I think perfectly sums up the whole attitude one should have when preparing to watch this film: “You really think you can fly this thing?” “You really think you can do all that bullshit you just said?”

The concept of a self-aware film has already become a familiar trope, but Independence Day acknowledges its nature as a big budget B-movie while never truly drawing attention to the fact. It’s all played straight, and yet it’s still hilariously playful, just the same. Here’s a film where you really have to turn off your brain and not really think too much about the action, lest you be driven into madness trying to nitpick all the little details of the plot and pinpoint all the ridiculous things that the characters within are saying and doing. Once you do that, you’ll likely find yourself enjoying it far more than the film probably deserves. Read more…

Theatrical Review: “The Avengers”

May 8, 2012 12 comments
Directed by: Joss Whedon
Produced by: Kevin Feige
Written by: Joss Whedon (screenplay & story), Zak Penn (story)
Music by: Alan Silvestri
Cinematography by: Seamus McGarvey
Starring: Robert Downey, Jr., Chris Evans, Mark Ruffalo, Chris Hemsworth, Scarlett Johansson, Jeremy Renner, Tom Hiddleston, Clark Gregg, Samuel L. Jackson, Cobie Smulders, Stellan Skarsgård
Year: 2012

 

I don’t think I need to tell you that you need to go see this movie. If you’re among the several who contributed to this film’s current $641 million intake globally, you’ve likely already seen this film and are, probably, very likely going to go see this again sometime within the next month, if not within the week. While I’ve eagerly awaited the release of The Dark Knight Rises this past month plus, and while I’m fairly certain that it’s easily, very likely going to be among the best of what the superhero genre has to offer, its importance to the genre is fairly minuscule compared to the importance of what Marvel has done with The Avengers. They’ve taken years of development and the creation of five films starring four drastically different heroes and featuring several others and built it up to this one film. And you know what? They absolutely succeeded in this ambitious project of theirs. Bravo, Marvel, you’ve broken box office records!

But you know what? I could go on and on about how revolutionary the film is for you and possibly leave you with that much more knowledge about the inner politics of rights holders and stubborn studios and we’ll all be all the smarter for having taken a closer look, examined the specifics of Hollywood politics, and all that other crap that’s important to know but, good Lord, is usually boring to learn. And I’m not going to do that. You know why? Because when I went to that theatre two days early to buy tickets as soon as they went on sale at my local Harkins, when I went to the theatre about two hours early, by myself like the nutcase that I am, and waited in line in order to grab the good seats for my friends and myself, and when I sat there, watching the trailers and then the movie and then not one but TWO secret endings to the film, and when I left the theatre afterward having seen the film in its entirety, I could only think of one thing: “HOW AWESOME IS THIS!?” Read more…

“The Avengers” – Theatrical Trailer #2

February 29, 2012 Leave a comment

Wow. If this is somehow not as awesome as it looks, I well be very sad!

Please, Lord, let 2012 be a repeat of the awesome Iron Man / The Dark Knight summer of 2008!

image

Review: “Attack the Block”

February 21, 2012 2 comments
Directed by: Joe Cornish
Produced by: Nira Park & James Wilson; Jenny Borgars, Will Clarke, Olivier Courson, Matthew Justice, Tessa Ross, and Edgar Wright (exec. producers)
Written by: Joe Cornish
Starring: John Boyega, Jodie Whittaker, Alex Esmail, Franz Drameh, Leeon Jones, Simon Howard, Luke Treadaway, Jumayn Hunter, Nick Frost
Music By: Steven Price
Year: 2011

 

I’ve read several of the major publication reviews of this film on Rotten Tomatoes (not all of them, but several), and it seems as though the general consensus regarding Attack the  Block among many of the reviewers is that the film is ultimately a B-film that they happened to have enjoyed. Many, including some of the more favorable reviews, are quick to point out the film is a “satire” of genre tropes and a film more concerned about pacing than plotting. Read more…

2011 in Review: My 10 Favorite Films, 3 – 1

January 30, 2012 5 comments

3.  Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol (December 21)

This film barely made this list. For the longest time, it was actually on the Notable Films I Managed to Avoid list thanks to its late December release date. In the middle of writing these 2011 in Review articles, however, I managed to run out into theatres and catch an early morning showing a couple weeks ago while it was still on a properly large-sized screen. I’m glad I did, too! Read more…

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